So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Randomize
