i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
So here I am, sexting at work.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
