Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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