the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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