I think I am morally bankrupt
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
