Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Randomize
