I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize
