Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Randomize
