your room smells of hookers.
And success
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
