Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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