...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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