Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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