Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
Farmville is her only friend.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Randomize
