the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
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