So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Randomize
