in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
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