Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
