I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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