I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
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