I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Randomize
