Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
