You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize
