Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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