READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Farmville is her only friend.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
