i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
