This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Are these your boobs on my camera?
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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