Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
The power of my boobs compel you
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
