once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
