He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
