I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Randomize
