you guys were way drunker than both of me
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Randomize
