listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
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