Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
