escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
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