in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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