so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
