butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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