he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
