The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
