What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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