That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Randomize
