That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize
