i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Randomize
