grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize