mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
