Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
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