hell yes lets make some ravioli
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
