hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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