you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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