That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
