come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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